Anna Wintour

"What? Oh, nothing. Just hanging out with all of my friends."

 

Contract date: Who the hell knows

This one hardly needs any explanation, although she’s pissed off the devil so many times that he’s just waiting, sharpening his claws.  First of all, he does NOT wear Prada.  I mean, really – all those ugly prints? And the shoes with the “weird for weird’s sake” heels?  And the pretension of those space age stores with skate board ramp type floors and salespeople who look like they are about to drop dead at any minute? And don’t even get him started on their 2007 handbag line…

Johannes says:  I believe that underneath that frosty exterior is a warm-hearted woman whose heart bleeds for animals, for young women with body issues and for those who make less than five million a year. I believe that she’s really, truly concerned about ….snnooooooooooooorrrt. Sorry. Couldn’t do it with straight face anymore.  She’s screwed.

Tucker Max

They don't.

 

Date of Contract: 2006

Tucker Max and his dirty, lousy, utterly gratifying book I Hope They Serve Beer in Hell has become one of the first  publicly acknowledged contracts with the devil.  He will always be remembered as the brave one to first come out.  Hopefully, others will follow.  Like this guy.  Progress, people! It’s inevitable. Embrace your fate!

Johannes says: I love this guy, but it’s just too easy. He already knows where he’s going – he’s just going to have a great time before he gets there.  It takes some of the fun out of it, and I don’t envy the devil in devising his punishment – the paradox of choice here is astounding.  Does he go into the womanizing pits of hell with all the politicians?  Does he go into the addict’s special section wherein every conceivable form of abusable substance is placed just out of reach?  Make him a eunuch? Throw him in with the date rapers?  The drunk drivers? The Jack Nicholson wannabes? The fallen frat boys? AGHHH.  I”m glad I”m not making that decision.